sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
