Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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