you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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