All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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