her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Is it penis luge time yet?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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