$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I've blown a few things in my day
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
