He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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