Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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