he thought i was a dude.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
