are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
