he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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