idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
