if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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