The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
sarcasm needs its own font
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
