He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
