I want to make a zoo with you.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
