We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
We need to get me chipped asap
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
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