She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
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