NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
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