you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
this boner is exhausting
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
