you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
