It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I was not drunk enough for that final.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
