Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
