I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
