So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
