oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Houston, we have a blender
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
