Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
