I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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