I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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