We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
