I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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