After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
In other news, I just burned my penis
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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