My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
