i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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