sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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