i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
