Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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