If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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