Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize