If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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