I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
My breasts were aching with rage.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
