sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
