Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
