kristin has been a bad kristin
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
