Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
