I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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