I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
