Whod you bang
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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