I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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