so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
