East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
